What is Wonder Worth?
This week as I jogged through prairies and hiked up foothills and meandered about with coffee in hand, I contemplated the worth of wonder. Here are my musings…I’d love to hear yours. Do share. 
What is wonder worth?
If all that caused me to render words useless, to halt my step, to slack my jaw, if all that somehow vanished…
If all that enticed my unconscious toward gratitude or called my curiosity to come and play, if all that succumbs to extinction…
If the numinous, the ineffable, the source of unexplainable beauty breathed no more…
My joy would die with it.
What is wonder worth? All the joy in my world.
What has wonder cost me?
Faster heartbeats and the slowing of time.
“Thank yous” whispered, some aloud.
A glance turned to a gaze.
I could have paid more.
An early morn to meet the rising sun.
A longer drive to chase a harvest moon.
On a rare day, a prayer on my knees.
I should have paid more.
A handwritten note.
A “I love you, too.”
A stooping low to meet a child’s eyes.
It has cost me so little, but I’ve promised it my heart.
Oh, to keep my promise.
What would I give for more?
I’d like to think I’d exchange the comfort of distraction for the rigor of intention.
On a good day I’d trade the ease of entertainment for the posture of surprise.
But could I barter this?
Control, the illusion I cling to.
My defenses, the power I wield to guard my broken heart.
Entitlement and pride for the fair market price of gratitude and awe.
I desire to desire that–to give my heart to higher loves.
How would life be poorer without wonder?
A desert without flowers.
A moon without light.
A mother without child.
A hope without cause.
“The beginning of our happiness lies in the understanding that life without wonder is not worth living.” ― Abraham Joshua Heschel
Now for you…I’m curious how you might respond:
What is wonder worth?
What has it cost you?
What would you give for more?
How would your life be poorer without it?
I absolutely love your musings. What a wonderful observation, Tamara – that wonder costs only gratitude, and really, what kind “cost” is paid so freely and effortlessly. It hardly seems fair to call it costly. So why is it so hard for me to put myself in the way of it? I watched Wild this past weekend with some friends and she talked about how she was choosing to put herself in the way of beauty. I love that. I think it’s detrimental to our hope and the light in our spirit if we don’t. Maybe because of the gratitude it brings. How much of a pain is it drag my rear out of bed early enough to catch the sunrise. How relentless is the gratitude and wonder that follows? How much does the wonder and gratitude over take the pain it took to witness it? And yet…why does it feel so hard right now? Thanks, Tamara. 🙂 For pricking my conscience – for reminding me to allow myself to be enamored with His beauty.
Kristin, it’s such a gift to get your reflections. I do love Cheryl Strayed’s approach to put herself in the way of beauty. Thanks so much for sharing!